It has been a strange and emotional week.

A lot of technical stuff, dealing with tour, dates, mailing out promo materials, cds, looking for a new van, getting things ready and in place to go up and record the EP, all kinds of business stuff.

Emotionally its been a wrecking week and I am exhausted. I like that I am independent and have a lifestyle where I get to go as I please, but that also means I don’t have many friends because my job doesn’t allow time to keep up with people. It gets a little lonely on a day like today, I’d like to go out and see a movie, or get a drink, or go and watch a band, but I don’t have anyone to go with. Instead, I’ll just continue chucking away at my career stuff and hopefully something good will happen by the end of the night.

Im feeling weird, very alienated, but I also don’t want to be around anyone. Its strange, having so much to deal with on a personal level, and not having any shows, because normally I would go to the gig and play and feel better, because thats my purpose in life, but when I don’t have that and I feel like this, I can’t even write. Its like having the bad case of the butterflies in the stomach that feel more like palmetto bugs, constantly. Its overwhelming.

Anyhow, I am going to look at a van today. Hopefully this will be the one for us. And I will have a mechanic with me, which is a big relief for everyone involved.

wish me luck.

Nervous,
Lil X.

ps. i got a new friend on my arm to keep me company and remind me where my heart is at.

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